I have refrained from commenting on this series, because I know that there is always offence caused, by viewpoints. It has been a good series, which we have watched and reflected on…there were some amazing moments, some heart breaking moments, and some what? moments. It certainly wasn’t easy watching.
I think a key positive benefit of the programme is that people have been informed about the adoption process, and people have been talking about it. But, and there is always a but, I have read an awful lot of comments about how awful it is that there are so many children waiting, who just want a mum and dad to love them…which misses an important point, in most cases, they have a mum (and sometimes a dad) who love them. You cannot wipe out the past, it is always there.
It was reassuring to see contact between children in care and their parents. It was good that the programme makers decided to show that there is love between the birth parents and their children, even if they do not know and cannot learn how to look after them. Because that is a key message here, my boy’s birth mums love them… They need to hear that, just as they need to hear their foster parents loved them, and still do. They need to hear that they are loveable.
I was thrilled to see the older sibling group – Lauren and Liam been placed with an family for adoption. But it would have been nice to see what sort of package of support the family were offered, because I am sure that they would need it. It can be difficult enough with a small child to help them come to terms with what their story is, I cannot imagine how difficult it would be with older children.
I think foster carers do an amazing job, they really do and I think this series highlighted that fact. The boys both had amazing foster parents, they and we were very fortunate with them. When watching I was worried about the foster parents who let the little boy call them Mum and Dad. This makes the idea of parents more transitional in my head. The idea of living with (birth) mum and dad, moving to (foster) mum and dad, and them onto (adoptive) mum and dad…doesn’t help with the idea of permanence and forever for any child. It’s difficult enough for adopted children to believe that they will stay forever.
There is a nagging question in my head…what happens next for these children? I am glad the programme was shown, there were far more positives than negatives. And I hope it helps some of those children waiting to find their forever homes.
This week the Adoption Social are hosting a blog hop… feel free to click below and find some more blog posts to read.
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