It is that time again…nativity plays at school, at church, even this year at Beavers. It’s that time of year that I dread because at some point, someone unknowing will say something that upsets me.
There will be complaints at school because you aren’t allowed to take photos of your own child in the nativity play…because someone else has said that school have no right to take photos of their child. And isn’t it selfish of that parent to refuse photo permission and maybe their child should just not be in the nativity play if they are so paranoid.
There will be adjustments at Church; because usually there is a full cast photo that someone will decide to upload to FB. But everyone knows that there are some (make that two) children who aren’t allowed photos on FB, so there will be two photos, one with and one without. And I will live with dread until I see the photo can check my boys aren’t there. And I know and trust these people…but I am still that paranoid.
When I am at work, I spend a lot of time talking to teenagers about the fact that any photos, any facts, anything that they put on the internet, is there forever. That they can post something, later regret it, delete it, and it will still be on the internet. An image can be copied and stored. Information is stored. It is there FOREVER. And you can’t do a thing about it.
My boys are adopted. We adopted from our local agency. Their birth parents live within the same metropolitan district as we do. And one set of birth parents lives in an area, where other people that I know and are friends with (in life as well as on facebook). So a photo of my boy appears online, I am tagged, my friend sees and comments on it, and then all their friends can see the photo. Someone I don’t know can see that photo and start thinking and put 2 and 2 together. And suddenly my family is at risk, because someone else did something I won’t do. Any photos of my boys online are side or back on… for good reason. If I think you need a photo of my children… trust me, you will have one, if you think you need one, ask me, and I’ll give you one!
EDITED TO SAY – there were the usual facebook photos – including one that a parent was asked to remove by the head of primary school! I didn’t see the original post, nor the complaining post following it..but I am reliably informed that a)my boy wasn’t on it & b)my friend still argued the point that people have the right to choose!
I also saw the humour that the 3 children in Jelly’s nursery class are all related to teachers…that isn’t the reason I don’t want Jelly’s photo online, but the other two are the daughter of a primary school teacher and the granddaughter of the primary school teacher. Something to think on maybe?